Yearn
by nessie6
Summary: Use of 30Kisses themes. "...and then it was when Ruka realized he hadn't danced with her at all that night, that the one other time he had dared to ask she had turned him down." Kain/Ruka. I apologize most profusely for lame story title.


**Theme #4- news; letter**

**Pairing: Kain/Ruka**

**Summary: " …And then it was when Ruka realized he hadn't danced with her at all that night, that the one other time he had dared to ask was when she had turned him down. "**

**Chapter One- Dance**

Besides the downward twitch to her lips and a slight grunt escaping the confines of her elegant throat, Ruka showed no outward reactions towards the content of the letter she held in her hand, now dangling from her slim fingers as she crossed her arms under her breasts and gazed at the scenery from the window.

"_I guess I should've been expecting it_," she thought to herself, letting out a small huff of breath as she thought about the requirement her family was expecting of her. She was turning eighteen, and it was expected for noble female vampires to be promised to another around the age. It had only been a matter of time before her family would arrange a gathering for the noble families in order for Ruka to catch the interest of a male noble to be her husband.

Her thoughts led her to Kaname-sama, and she felt the familiar twinge in her chest when she thought of him. For so long she had hoped he would come to her, to drink her blood and love her, but he loved only his pureblood sister. A sister, it so happened, who was torn between her love for her pureblood brother and a wretched human-vampire. Her fingers tightened on the sleeve of her Night Class uniform, the letter in her hand crinkling slightly under the strain of her fingers.

If Kaname-sama had chosen Ruka, _she _would've devoted all of her love to him. It just so happened that it had been months since he had intended to take Yuuki Cross as his lover and Ruka was just forcing herself to move on, although she still felt a pain every time her thoughts drifted to him.

"What's the matter?" a smooth, deep voice spoke from behind her. Even though she had felt the presence before he had spoken, Ruka still flinched slightly. She knew without turning that it was Kain, and that he would've seen her flinch. He had always been perceptive, especially to her feelings.

"Nothing," she stated flatly, "I'm just expected to be paraded around for strangers to feast their sights on, as if I was some bartering item instead of a woman with desires of her own." Turning her head slightly to her left, she looked over her shoulder at him, her long light brown hair slipping further from her shoulder and down her back. "Didn't you get the invite? You can come and ogle at me too."

He didn't say anything for a moment. "Perhaps it is lost amongst Hanabusa's treasures," he replied lightly, his left hand stuffed into his pocket as he took a few steps closer to her. He stood only a half of a step behind her and slightly to her left, so he was just hovering over her shoulder. He appeared to be looking out of the window she had been gazing out of moments before, but her eyes remained on her friend.

"You'll get one," she said flatly. "You're a noble and a friend, after all."

"Hanabusa must have it," he repeated, a strand of his copper-colored hair falling into his eyes.

"It takes place next weekend," she sighed, her eyes shifting back towards the window as his eyes roved on to gaze at her.

He didn't say anything, because nothing he could utter would bring Ruka any comfort. Instead, the hand that wasn't resting in his pocket moved to touch her shoulder briefly.

Ruka sighed. "Come, it's time for our class," she said, and turned on her heel without looking at him, the letter crumpling in her fist. After a pause, he followed her.

* * *

"Excited, aren't you?" Aidou sang, twirling slightly about their cluttered room and waving his invitation in his taller cousin's deadpan face.

"What makes you say that?" Kain asked, his voice flat. Aidou paused in his prancing, and stood over his cousin who was sitting on the edge of his bed. The blond placed his hands on his hips, taking the rare opportunity to look down at his cousin.

All flamboyant façade aside, he said, quite seriously, "Because you're in love with her."

Kain was staring at the invitation in his hands, so Aidou could not see his face, but he _did _see the taller man's finger twitch.

"Why would you think that?" and perhaps it was his imagination, which he doubted, but Aidou thought he actually detected the tiniest tremor in his cousin's voice.

Instead of calling his cousin out on it, Aidou fixed a grin on his face, "Because I'm a genius, and of course it would've been _obvious _to someone like _me_—"

Kain swore that Aidou's nose was growing as he ranted on.

"—and I know you, even though I'm probably not as attune to people as you are," the blond now had a tiny smile on his face, no trace of mockery or sarcasm anywhere in it. "And I know you've loved her for…years, probably."

Kain found himself without any reply, because Aidou was right. The boy _did _have eyes, when he deemed to use them, after all.

"Not that it matters," he finally said after a few moments of silence, as Aidou had gone to the body-length mirror and was now fretfully perfecting the adjustments of his hair.

"I think she's more over Kaname-sama than she thinks," Aidou inputted, leaning in towards the mirror to examine a suspected blemish, but it was just a false alarm. "It's been months."

"She was in love with him for years."

"Pfft, she was just infatuated for most of them. Do you remember how annoying she'd be? Asking stupid questions about him all the time."

"They're still strong feelings," Kain argued. With a sigh, he crumpled the paper in his hands.

"Are you not going?" Aidou asked incredulously, his blue eyes looking at the forlorn man sitting on the bed through the mirror.

"Of course I am," Kain replied monotonously, "I'm her friend."

And with that, he stood and abruptly left the room. Aidou sighed, his eyes shifting back to his reflection.

"Wish she'd see what was in front of her eyes," Aidou muttered almost darkly.

* * *

She was beautiful. Her light brown hair had been curled and pinned up into an elaborate bun, her navy blue skirts swished about her ankles, and her neckline was cut to show a fair but not exaggerated amount of cleavage. But the grace she exuded, the inner shyness he knew she felt, made his blood rush faster through his veins and he couldn't help but feel a longing for her. He quickly smothered the feeling.

The entire night, Kain watched as Ruka mingled with the other noble vampires, danced with them, engage in conversations she had no interest in having. He knew she was uncomfortable, that she didn't like dancing or socializing with people she didn't know. She was only comfortable when those of their Night Class came up to talk or dance with her.

"Akatsuki!" Ichijou greeted him enthusiastically, his green eyes bright and his blond hair falling gracefully into his eyes. "What are you doing here, being all antisocial?"

"Just watching the dancing," he answered back calmly, his arms ever crossed against his chest. He felt like he was almost choking from his attire; it was an unspoken rule that he would not be permitted to dress as lackadaisically as he did during his normal life.

"Why aren't _you _doing any of the dancing?" Ichijou questioned, his ever-present smile adorning his face."You know she must be uncomfortable, and I've already danced with her twice, as did Hanabusa, and even Kaname-sama danced with her once. Why haven't you yet?"

Kain shifted uncomfortably, his memory involuntarily darting back to the time she had turned down his offer to dance because she had refused to dance with anybody but the pureblood Kuran.

Ichijou took it upon himself to elbow Kain slightly in the side. "Go on, be her knight in shining armor!" And he winked at the taller vampire. Kain sighed in exasperation at the Ichijou's every present sunny disposition.

So when the music ended, Kain pushed himself from the wall, his eyes trained on Ruka as she disengaged from her previous dancing partner. She stealthily made a path between the milling people, until she had successfully exited the ballroom and onto the balcony outside, presumably to be alone.

And Kain followed her, weaving in and out of the milling dancers as another song began.

* * *

Ruka sighed as she leaned her forearms against the cool, stone railing, welcoming the light breeze that played with the stray curls of her hair as they softly tickled the sides of her face.

She had danced with nearly every male in the room, the students from the night class included. She couldn't help but feel slightly grateful towards them for making her feel slightly more comfortable, yet she rather she not dance at all. Aidou had taken it upon himself to dance with her three times, which showed Ruka that he really must pity her situation.

And Kaname-sama…

Ruka clenched her fists, willing herself to not feel anything towards the fact that he had felt obligated to dance with her. She knew he harbored no special affection towards her, and she had slowly learned to accept the fact. The twinge she felt in her heart every time she thought of him was no longer a sharp pain, but now a dull ache. But an ache it still was.

Her keen hearing picked up the sound of the last song playing and the start of the string instruments as they began a new song, and she realized she had been on the balcony for nearly ten minutes. She knew she would have to return to the party, yet Ruka savored this time alone, away from the crowd of strangers.

"Ruka," the smooth voice of Akatsuki Kain spoke from several feet behind her. This time, she jumped more visibly and turned fully to see him leaning against the pillar, his eyes watching her. For some reason, the scene played upon her memory. How long had he been standing there, watching her?

"Akatsuki," she said, and she knew with a small feeling of guilt that she had allowed coldness to seep into her voice without meaning to.

He didn't seem to take notice however, and he shifted from the pillar and took several steps closer, until he stood only a few feet away. "You alright?"

Like an automatic reaction she had to the sound of his soothing voice, Ruka felt the tenseness leave her body, a comfort taking its place that she had been want of all night. His presence, somehow, always seemed to have that affect on her.

"I'm just…tired, right now," she said softly, hugging her elbows.

As he continued to just stand there and stare at her without uttering a word, she felt the color rise slightly to her cheeks as she felt the atmosphere thicken with something unknown. Just when she was about to say something to break the atmosphere, he held out the hand that had been stuffed in his pocket.

He hadn't said anything out loud, but she was well aware of what he was asking her. And then it was when Ruka realized he hadn't danced with her at all that night, that the one other time he had dared to ask was when she had turned him down.

She placed her hand in his.

To her surprise, he didn't lead her back to the ball room, but drew her close right there on the balcony, placing his hand on the small of her back and grasping her right hand in his. The top of her head barely reached his collar bone, and she was forced to crane her neck in order to look into his eyes. He led her into a smooth, elegant waltz.

With only a slight inclination as to why, she felt her pulse quicken slightly. His eyes were a color between amber and brown, but she had never realized what a beautiful shade it was before. It seemed to help intensify the smoldering look he was giving her, but then she noticed that his brow was slightly furrowed, and there was a hint of melancholy about his features.

"And what do _you _have to be sad about?" she joked half-heartedly, cracking a small smile even as she felt her eyes become wet. She didn't know why she suddenly had the urge to cry.

His lips twitched into a barely-there smile, and his eyes did lighten up, yet still the melancholy lingered.

Kain drew her closer towards him, a scant two inches barely separating their bodies. She realized that they had stopped waltzing, and that they were now swaying slightly in one spot, away from the sight of the doors. He bent down slightly, his chin coming to a rest against her cheek. Ruka felt the sensation of his hair tickling the side of her face.

"There's always something to be sad about," he murmured, his breath tickling her ear, sending a small, imperceptible shiver down her spine. "It's just that this particular night brings it all out into the forefront."

Ruka felt a bitter smile twist her lips. She snaked the hand that was resting against his shoulder up until her fingers brushed lightly against the nape of his neck.

"Whatever it is," she murmured, "it can't be any worse than mine. I hope it resolves soon, I'm not used to seeing you upset, and I don't think I like it."

Was he drawing her closer?

"I need you for my support, tonight, Akatsuki," she choked out, her eyes welling up, suddenly over-bright, "you've always been my support. Always, _always_."

He didn't say anything, but their swaying slowed. Ruka hardly noticed it.

"I'm only just starting to get over Kaname-sama," she continued, "and now I'm expected to play some role to make myself more appealing to these nobles I have no interest in so I can be married off within a year or two," her fingers grasped the back of his collar tightly, while the hand holding his squeezed his larger one. "It's just…when I see him with her…you're lucky, Akatsuki, you can have no idea of the pain you feel of watching the one you love longing for someone else."

It was then she realized they had stopped moving all together, and that she was almost crushed against his chest. He was still bent so his cheek now rested against her temple, and to her confusion, she heard his breathing hitch in her ear.

She felt the smoothness of his cheek rub against hers, as he bent himself further, his mouth now lingering near her earlobe. Ruka stilled, her heartbeat quickening as she felt his hot, quick breath against her ear and neck.

It was then that Ruka froze in shock, as she felt his lips brush softly against the delicate spot just below her ear and against her jaw line. She could not suppress the gasp or the shiver that tingled down her spine.

"I know," he whispered against her ear. "I know."

She felt the tears that had been pooling in her eyes spill, sending wet trails down her porcelain cheeks. The grip he had on her tightened before he relaxed, taking a step back and let his arms fall to his sides. Ruka felt the onslaught of sobs start to wrack her body, and her eyes never left his as he lifted his hand to gently caress the tears from her face with his thumb.

There was a slight pause as his thumb lingered against her cheek, before his hand fell away. Ruka spotted the twist in his features, as if he were in pain, before he abruptly turned on his heel and swiftly made his way back into the ballroom, his hands in his pockets and his head bowed.

Ruka fell to the ground, sobs now wracking her entire body. She covered her face in her hands as her body trembled violently.

She felt as if a lead weight had been dropped into the pit of her stomach, and the gut-wrenching guilt was so painful, that she curled in on herself to relieve the pain. Yet at the same time, she felt a lightness in her chest that left her utterly elated, because, now she knew, that _somebody_, that Kain—

He loved her.

* * *

_A/N- So sorry if they seem OOC, but this is my first VK fic and I'm just starting the manga, but I've caught up on the anime. But yeah, I love Kain/Ruka because they're 1. Not main couple, 2. Subtle. So R&R, tell me what you thought! I'm just using the 30 Kisses themes, this is not actually part of the community. Apologize most prefusely for the sucky story title. _

_~nessie~_


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